(This is a forgotten blog, incomplete but I'm posting it anyway....)
Recently I went to the big town of Oklahoma City, Oklahoma to help a friend compete in the Mr. US of A MI contest. Chad Meridian was the 1st runner up for our great state of Arkansas, so he had a spot in the competition, with 43 other competitors!
I went into the situation with a bit of hesitation. Basically, I hate to commit, to most anything. I can commit to a job and I can commit to a girlfriend, but in the past, THAT WAS IT! That was the most anyone was getting out of me. After those two commitments are fulfilled, I’m all about me, me, and me! So, when my buddy C asked if I would participate, I mulled it over. I worried about it; I pushed myself into just fucking doing it. Why not? It’s not like she’s asking me to move furniture. And one thing I’d like to say about my buddy, she would pretty much do anything for anyone. Now I’m not saying she’s a push over by any means. She is just a nice, honest, genuine person. She has traits I’d like to attain. So, basically I put myself out there and just agreed to help. We practiced once a week for several months; I had the music on my iPod. I actually cared and wanted to do the best I could do. It was actually really fun. I enjoyed helping. Everyone was chipping in to do their part, caring as much as Chad did. It was good to be a part of a group of helpers that wanted to do their best so Chad would shine. And shine he did, in all reality, that boy shined without any of our help. It’s just that magnetic personality, oh…and jumping naked into the pool doesn’t hurt either.
So, off we go. We had to stay at the contestant sponsored hotel. It is a predominately gay hotel, known for gay men cruising each other and using the rooms “by the hour”. I kind of thought it was exciting, intriguing, yet sleazy all at once, a big bundle of naughty and queasy feelings combined. Course, once I started seeing the guys who were cruising, the naughty went away and the queasy became predominate. Anyway, along with helping Chad Meridian with his competition, we were also performing as KISS. I was the drummer. This persona was perfect for me. I could be on stage and rock out but behind the protection of a drum kit. So the first night was performance night. Perfect, get out the performance jitters before we have to be perfect for Chad’s competition. It went well, I had a blast. Even with the spray glue on my chest, fake black chest hair and a deep (and I mean deep) V uni-tard with pleather thigh highs. We rocked it…
Wednesday, March 24, 2010
Sunday, March 21, 2010
FIREWORKS (In Code)
At the end of the 9 month war... The little soldier stood at attention, tall enough to accomplish his mission...
He did more than knock at the door... He stepped in...Only the chain was on...But he stepped in none the less...
He was met by friendly gun-fire and a few cannonballs...But was quickly rescued by a motor boat.. That lost its gas tank...
And so Private Whippersnapper is beginning his long journey... And with any luck, he'll be home in time for Christmas... Though birthday is much preferred... Keep your fingers crossed, I know we are....
Loves to all... JGirl and Jack
He did more than knock at the door... He stepped in...Only the chain was on...But he stepped in none the less...
He was met by friendly gun-fire and a few cannonballs...But was quickly rescued by a motor boat.. That lost its gas tank...
And so Private Whippersnapper is beginning his long journey... And with any luck, he'll be home in time for Christmas... Though birthday is much preferred... Keep your fingers crossed, I know we are....
Loves to all... JGirl and Jack
Saturday, March 20, 2010
Friday, March 19, 2010
Monday, March 8, 2010
The Ramones AND The White Stripes in one morning!
One thing about me that you all may not know is that when I drive to work, that's when I do my best thinking. I plan out my day, or week and organize projects and tasks in my head....unfortunately, since I AM DRIVING I don't have the chance to write them out...so there is one small flaw in the plan. Anyway, this morning I was thinking of all I have to do in two days before we leave for nationals. I am helping one of my best-est in her drag competition. It's gonna rock! Go Chad! ha
So, one thing I have to do is my blood work for my endo doc. He's all freaked out because my cholesterol went up pretty significantly since I started T. I think it's mainly cause I went from being somewhat vegetarian to craving meat and potatoes. So my body is having to adjust, but I'm not a doctor so I've been cutting down on fatty foods, exercising and the like. But what do I do the night BEFORE I am supposed to get blood drawn? I eat McDonald's! Wow, is that not stupid? I mean, I was lazy and hungry so I just opted for the easiest fattiest meal around! I'm sure it wouldn't affect anything significantly but I do still worry. I don't want my doc to either suggest getting off T, which isn't an option, or put me on some meds. Ugh
Oh well, I forgot my paper with the order today anyway...so, tomorrow it will be.
This weekend I did a few things around the house. I love doing house stuff as long as they go well. I put up some mesh on a part of my gutters that get super clogged by leaves and cause issues....so we shall see how that goes. It was cheap mesh stuff so I'm sure I'll get what I paid for.
So, I guess I need to come up with a blog that is more pertinent to trans issues than just my simple musings. I was asked to participate in a blog group for our local community organization. I have an idea in mind but to be honest, writing is a chore for me these days. The words don't flow as well as they used to. And when they do flow, you get what you guys read here...stuff, in no particular order with a few slight witty comments here and there. Maybe I'll try it out on you guys here and if I could get some feedback. Basically it's an advocacy blog so it would need to be informational and not too personal and you know me, I'm all about personal...have heard the one about my junk? Haha, well...I leave it at that. I have to go get my tags for my truck. I will lie, I will lie about driving it..and park where they can't readily see it. I have issues with lying to authorities. I don't know why, it's not like I respect authority figures or the law. But that my little guardian angel likes to tsk tsk me when I'm about to lie, so....I have to get him drunk before we go...any ideas?
So, one thing I have to do is my blood work for my endo doc. He's all freaked out because my cholesterol went up pretty significantly since I started T. I think it's mainly cause I went from being somewhat vegetarian to craving meat and potatoes. So my body is having to adjust, but I'm not a doctor so I've been cutting down on fatty foods, exercising and the like. But what do I do the night BEFORE I am supposed to get blood drawn? I eat McDonald's! Wow, is that not stupid? I mean, I was lazy and hungry so I just opted for the easiest fattiest meal around! I'm sure it wouldn't affect anything significantly but I do still worry. I don't want my doc to either suggest getting off T, which isn't an option, or put me on some meds. Ugh
Oh well, I forgot my paper with the order today anyway...so, tomorrow it will be.
This weekend I did a few things around the house. I love doing house stuff as long as they go well. I put up some mesh on a part of my gutters that get super clogged by leaves and cause issues....so we shall see how that goes. It was cheap mesh stuff so I'm sure I'll get what I paid for.
So, I guess I need to come up with a blog that is more pertinent to trans issues than just my simple musings. I was asked to participate in a blog group for our local community organization. I have an idea in mind but to be honest, writing is a chore for me these days. The words don't flow as well as they used to. And when they do flow, you get what you guys read here...stuff, in no particular order with a few slight witty comments here and there. Maybe I'll try it out on you guys here and if I could get some feedback. Basically it's an advocacy blog so it would need to be informational and not too personal and you know me, I'm all about personal...have heard the one about my junk? Haha, well...I leave it at that. I have to go get my tags for my truck. I will lie, I will lie about driving it..and park where they can't readily see it. I have issues with lying to authorities. I don't know why, it's not like I respect authority figures or the law. But that my little guardian angel likes to tsk tsk me when I'm about to lie, so....I have to get him drunk before we go...any ideas?
Tuesday, March 2, 2010
Positivity...try it, you might like it!
Today is a good day. Well, work still sucks but what can I do? I do believe that evil shall not prevail and if I can stick it out...goodness, compassion, and morals will come out ahead. I will just dig in my heels, keep my ethics, and keep on trucking.
But today's post is just going to be an affirmation of sorts...a verbal pick me up on what IS going well in my life. Maybe it will even make some of you smile as once again...I'm gonna talk about my junk a bit later. Ha, and I know how we all love our "junk"
So first off, something that is going well is our relationship, my girl and I. Actually you'd think with all this stress in our lives, me with my job and well, her job situation, we would be at each others throats. Well, that hasn't been the case thank god. We have just realized that things suck right now and to keep a small bit of happiness in our lives, we need to bond together and take it all in stride. And not fuck up things by fighting over the stressers that we really have no control over. So, baby...thank you for putting up with my bad moods. I've tried to keep it together somewhat and not vent too much. That's what this blog is for. ha
Second, I have actually been succeeding in my workout/running plan like I've never done before. Oh I've said many many times to myself..."I'm going to REALLY start working out" or "I'm going to start running." The problem is, I never do. But this time, I'm doing it. I'm running 2-3 times a week. (I know, that's not THAT much but it's better than where I've been) And, I'm working on weights about that much too. And it shows. My body is probably in the best shape it's ever been. I mean when I was a wee young lad, I was quite svelte but as far as fit, I'd say I was just genetically lucky! Well, and I had those pesky girl curves to deal with. Yucky! But now, my shoulders are wider, my thighs are tight and boy shaped and my butt, well, my butt has shrunk and shrunk. It's so tiny and freaking hard! Every time I get my shot now I cry and moan to my girl, she's about to give up and make me do it myself since I've been such a wuss. But, she is so good at it. I know anyone else giving it to me or even giving it to myself, it would be more painful. She's as gentle as an angel. :)
Next has to be how I feel and look. I'm looking at myself in the mirror these days and happy with what I'm seeing. I'm liking my face shape. I'm liking the body shape. I'm liking all the changes that are happening to me. I'm loving the hair that is growing on my body. My girl calls me monkey butt cause my ass is all cute and fuzzy now. My muscle definition is starting to show. I've been muscular before due to my profession, but it always had a layer of fat on top. So, it's never looked the way I imagined it in my mind. Like guys muscles.
And lastly, here we go...my junk. Well, he's getting big. But like any man, I want it bigger. I want people to be impressed with what I have. So I did what any T-blooded transman would do, I bought a pump. Yup, I did. And I used it. I used it quite a bit. I was calling it practice. I said that I need to use it and learn the ins and outs of how it works, how it makes me feel. And if two to three times a week is suggested, then what's wrong with everyday. That just means he'll get bigger faster, right? Dude logic for sure! But in all reality, it was just a new toy that I could get my rocks off with. So, with my girls new work schedule started. That afforded me some "private" time with my new toy. And I remember the last thing she said to me before going to work was "don't hurt yourself", famous last words. Ha, so I went about my exploration, my expedition if you will with careful abandon. I wanted to experience what it was all about. So, to be real honest, it definitely "pumped up" things, but it wasn't exactly making me hot and bothered. So what did I do? I was determined to succeed. So, I tried and tried. And when I finally succeeded, what did I see? OH MY GOD! IS THAT BLOOD? Ha ha..funny now but not then. I saw blood in the wee little cylinder that is used to enhance my junk. I immediately removed it to see the damage. And luckily, thankfully, my junk was intact and relatively unharmed except a tiny cut...not real sure how that happened. But it did. So the moral of this story is for anyone experimenting with such an apparatus...be careful,very VERY careful. I was careful but apparently not enough. So after it's all said and done, I've been going around and saying that I popped my peter. And for a guy...that isn't even funny, not something one jokes about. But I am just thankful it was minor so now I can laugh it off. But I've learned my lesson. I think I'll let it grow naturally from now on. After all, it's not the size of the boat, it's the motion of the ocean. And I got a damn tsunami in these here pants!
Later..........
J
But today's post is just going to be an affirmation of sorts...a verbal pick me up on what IS going well in my life. Maybe it will even make some of you smile as once again...I'm gonna talk about my junk a bit later. Ha, and I know how we all love our "junk"
So first off, something that is going well is our relationship, my girl and I. Actually you'd think with all this stress in our lives, me with my job and well, her job situation, we would be at each others throats. Well, that hasn't been the case thank god. We have just realized that things suck right now and to keep a small bit of happiness in our lives, we need to bond together and take it all in stride. And not fuck up things by fighting over the stressers that we really have no control over. So, baby...thank you for putting up with my bad moods. I've tried to keep it together somewhat and not vent too much. That's what this blog is for. ha
Second, I have actually been succeeding in my workout/running plan like I've never done before. Oh I've said many many times to myself..."I'm going to REALLY start working out" or "I'm going to start running." The problem is, I never do. But this time, I'm doing it. I'm running 2-3 times a week. (I know, that's not THAT much but it's better than where I've been) And, I'm working on weights about that much too. And it shows. My body is probably in the best shape it's ever been. I mean when I was a wee young lad, I was quite svelte but as far as fit, I'd say I was just genetically lucky! Well, and I had those pesky girl curves to deal with. Yucky! But now, my shoulders are wider, my thighs are tight and boy shaped and my butt, well, my butt has shrunk and shrunk. It's so tiny and freaking hard! Every time I get my shot now I cry and moan to my girl, she's about to give up and make me do it myself since I've been such a wuss. But, she is so good at it. I know anyone else giving it to me or even giving it to myself, it would be more painful. She's as gentle as an angel. :)
Next has to be how I feel and look. I'm looking at myself in the mirror these days and happy with what I'm seeing. I'm liking my face shape. I'm liking the body shape. I'm liking all the changes that are happening to me. I'm loving the hair that is growing on my body. My girl calls me monkey butt cause my ass is all cute and fuzzy now. My muscle definition is starting to show. I've been muscular before due to my profession, but it always had a layer of fat on top. So, it's never looked the way I imagined it in my mind. Like guys muscles.
And lastly, here we go...my junk. Well, he's getting big. But like any man, I want it bigger. I want people to be impressed with what I have. So I did what any T-blooded transman would do, I bought a pump. Yup, I did. And I used it. I used it quite a bit. I was calling it practice. I said that I need to use it and learn the ins and outs of how it works, how it makes me feel. And if two to three times a week is suggested, then what's wrong with everyday. That just means he'll get bigger faster, right? Dude logic for sure! But in all reality, it was just a new toy that I could get my rocks off with. So, with my girls new work schedule started. That afforded me some "private" time with my new toy. And I remember the last thing she said to me before going to work was "don't hurt yourself", famous last words. Ha, so I went about my exploration, my expedition if you will with careful abandon. I wanted to experience what it was all about. So, to be real honest, it definitely "pumped up" things, but it wasn't exactly making me hot and bothered. So what did I do? I was determined to succeed. So, I tried and tried. And when I finally succeeded, what did I see? OH MY GOD! IS THAT BLOOD? Ha ha..funny now but not then. I saw blood in the wee little cylinder that is used to enhance my junk. I immediately removed it to see the damage. And luckily, thankfully, my junk was intact and relatively unharmed except a tiny cut...not real sure how that happened. But it did. So the moral of this story is for anyone experimenting with such an apparatus...be careful,very VERY careful. I was careful but apparently not enough. So after it's all said and done, I've been going around and saying that I popped my peter. And for a guy...that isn't even funny, not something one jokes about. But I am just thankful it was minor so now I can laugh it off. But I've learned my lesson. I think I'll let it grow naturally from now on. After all, it's not the size of the boat, it's the motion of the ocean. And I got a damn tsunami in these here pants!
Later..........
J
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